IT'S A SMALL WORLD AFTER ALL IT'S A SMALL WORLD AFTER ALL IT'S A SMALL WORLD AFTER ALL

[trombones]

Out of all the weird texts Sans ever got, "who wants a free trip to Disneyland" was the new number-one, knocking "BROTHER I NEED SHAVING CREAM IT'S AN EMERGENCY" off the charts.

The skeleton already knew something was up, especially when the word "free" came from Mettaton of all people. Hoo boy. Part of him was a little worried, but knowing MTT's track record with his brother, they probably weren't... hurt or dead or something. Just in some really, REALLY stupid shit.

Honestly, though. Who DOESN'T want a free trip to Disneyland? Because Sans barely knows what Disneyland is, and he already wants to go.

So here he was!! Normally, this would be the part where he takes advantage of room service for the next three hours but first, he had to make sure his brother wasn't actually on fire or whatever. He walks up to Mettaton and Papyrus' room and raps on the door.

"Knock knock."

PULL UP PULL UP PULL UP IN THE MONSTER, AUTOMOBILE GANGSTER.

Comments

[ex_mettacrusher33]

Whatever. MTT knows Sans didn't even know what Tier 15 meant. Papyrus told him so.

But there are more important things! Like... not being trapped in a Harlan Ellison novel! The second he hears the chair squeak, the core cautiously peaks above his own "shoulder" to see that the skeleton has, in fact, turned around. Satisfied, he makes his way to the front of his body, staring warily at the opening in the front panel.

If this did not work, there was a strong possibility that this could fry out his body with him inside of it. Just one, awful ZAP and that was it. Goodbye, Underground's star. Hello, dust.

Uuugh. Giving up his immortality... The things he did for fame.

There was a click as the core set itself back inside of its metal shell, then a hiss as the panels closed behind it. Electricity hummed as magic from the core transferred into robotic limbs and...

"DARLING, IF YOU DON'T TURN AROUND NOW, HOW DO YOU EXPECT ME TO GIVE YOU A ONCE-IN-A-LIFETIME MTT-BRAND EMBRACE?"

[trombones]

Okay, but he literally still doesn't know what Tier 15 is. And the way Papyrus talked about it, Sans almost thought you guys were having mecha-skeleton babies.

Luckily, that mini-heart attack was over and done with. Sans folds his hands over his ribs and leans back while he waits for Mettton to adjust himself. Rearrange himself. Whatever he's doing in there. As obnoxious as the skeleton can be, he can at least respect a Privacy when it comes to stuff like this.

Whatever happened, it sounded like it worked. Literally. Click, hum, Mettaton. Acting like he's going to give you something you didn't even know you asked for. Yep. He's back. Sans grins and whirls back around.

"Aw. Don't sweat it, Wheelies."

Why does he have a feeling there's only a 50% chance this is a real offer.

[ex_mettacrusher33]

Considering the two of them, perhaps ignorance is for the better. But lord, could you even imagine their hypothetical child? It'd be a sentient horror show.

Anyway, that feeling is because Sans is either bad at math or Mettaton, because Mettaton's sweeping forward to try and pick up the skeleton in a spinning hug attack anyway. "OOOOH DARLING, YOU'RE MY (SECOND) HERO!!"

Limbs! Glorious limbs!

[trombones]

Good god, don't even joke about something like that.

And welp, Sans was half-right. The skeleton is used to Papyrus picking him up enough that he's not even surprised, but he's also used to having somebody equally skeleton-shaped to hold onto. Good thing Mettaton's got huge hands.

"Whoa--"

Okay, you know what? This is fine. Mettaton can hug attack him. Sans just chuckles. Once the spinning stops, he pats the top of the robot's head.

"Heheheheh. Hey. Glad to be of service, pal. It was easy stuff. Bone appetite."

[ex_mettacrusher33]

Gasp!

He sets Sans down as quickly as he picked him up, hands going to his "hips". "SANS! HOW CRASS!!" Then, in a tone that sounded both scandalized and suspiciously like a teenager sitting around with their besties and talking about their crush: "YOU SAID TO WAIT UNTIL AFTER YOU LEFT."

[trombones]

?????????

Okay, he's being set down now.

"Huh?" Give him a second. "After what..."

OH. Ew.

"... Wow, dude. That was just a pun. Yeah, no, still wait."

[ex_mettacrusher33]

...oh.

Oh.

He's found it. Scientists have searched tirelessly for years to find the subject that could fluster the unbreakable Sans. They'd concluded the only thing capable was the queen Toriel, but, as of this second, there's been a breakthrough discovery.

There is another.

Mettaton's still chuckling. It's that awful, terrible laugh he does when he's teasing Alphys about her crushes, intentionally setting up Papyrus for awful puns, or letting loose snails in Blooky's room. It's that shitty, knowing laugh he does when he's about to transform into the world's most annoying best friend/boyfriend/younger-family-member.

"YOU'RE THE ONE WHO SAID IT, SANS. NOT ME. AT LEAST I KNOW WE HAVE YOUR SUPPORT FOR WHEREVER OUR RELATIONSHIP DECIDES TO GO."

[trombones]

To be fair, it's not as much of a fluster button as Toriel is. It's more of an ew-gross-brother-cooties-but-I'm-still-happy-for-you kind of thing. Sans quirks a non-eyebrow.

"Uh, yeah. Sure. You guys do that. Just not in front of me."